What I Ate Wednesday: My Struggle to Keep Up With the Joneses 

Today I want to talk about keeping up with the Joneses. More specifically, how caught up I can get wanting to BE the Joneses.

When it first crossed my mind to blog about this topic, my instinct was like, “um WHY would you publicly broadcast this weakness of yours on the internet, again? How about no?”

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Carrot Cake Oatmeal
{rolled oats // almond milk // 1 shredded carrot // 1 mashed banana //
cinnamon // sea salt // raisins // coconut // peanut butter}

But then the irony occurred to me. I struggle with being vulnerable, and I struggle to admit that I struggle with being vulnerable.

So here I am, addressing step 1 of the equation.

I guess it’s just been becoming more and more clear to me lately that I LOVE radiating an image of having it all together all the time.

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Pre-Workout Bite
{Kiwi // Raspberries} 

You’re coming over? I may slave away for the entire 24 hours before your arrival and spend 4 hours cleaning up, but “ohhhh that was SUCH an easy recipe and I barely even dirtied a dish!”

In other news, I am already stressed to plan my wedding (despite having no plans to get married anytime soon) because I feel like each one has to be bigger and better and bolder than the last. Like, I can’t just forfeit the wedding competition, here!

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Post-Workout Lunch
{whole wheat pita // mashed lentil loaf // hummus // cucumber // peas}

Also, I can’t eat too many desserts in front of you because what if you think that’s all I eat?! “Guys, when I’m not eating chocolate, I eat like seventeen thousand vegetables in a day, I PROMISE”.

And in a couple weeks when I’m in the middle of finals and having a mild panic attack inside, you best believe that I’ll still be dressed, coiffed and have my face on every time I’m in public. Sorry, unless you’re one of 5 people in my life, you know what I look like with 3 layers of mascara on. End of story.

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Or lastly, this summer, when it would have been really fun to do some road races with my dad but I didn’t because my times would have been considerably slower than they used to be and the thought of that being public knowledge didn’t float my boat.

And after some thought, you know what I think it comes down to? I think it comes down to the fact that when we put a piece of our identity into something, the thought of other people not seeing us that way is SCARY.

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Mandatory Daily Chocolate #1

Now let me be clear and say that if wedding planning brings you joy and you want your day to be extravagant and lavish then GO FOR IT. And if you love hosting people and spending time preparing for it, that is YOU and that is awesome.

I’m not trying to say that we should stray from any of these things or that our goal should be to walk around looking like a hot mess all the time so that we can be more “real”. But what I am trying to say is that we should do these things because we want to.

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Afternoon Snacks
{Mary’s Gone crackers // hummus // apple} 

Not because we want to appear perfect. Not because we’re trying to one-up the people around us. Not because we’re under pressure to maintain titles people have put on us.

All throughout my childhood when someone would put me down or come off as arrogant, my mom would tell me they were probably insecure about something. I’m not sure I even really understood what she meant at the time.

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A veggie-fied version of a childhood favourite
{crispy tofu fingers + sweet potato fries // steamed broc}

But years later, as much as taking time to reflect on my insecurities SUCKS, I’m starting to realize that I need to seek them out and come to peace with them. Because it is those very insecurities that make me pretentious and competitive and lame. Ohhh how moms know best.

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Mandatory Daily Chocolate #2 (so goooooood)

Being obsessed with having it all together does nobody any good. We’re in this together, boys and girls. At our strongest and at our weakest.

So here’s to admitting that sometimes I eat cookies at lunchtime for 5 consecutive days, that I loved every minute I spent cooking for you but it did indeed take me 5 hours, and that while I still enjoy it just as much, I don’t run as fast as I used to.

Happy Wednesday doing YOU. 


P.s. It’s WIAW! Other bloggers’ posts are here.

35 thoughts on “What I Ate Wednesday: My Struggle to Keep Up With the Joneses 

  1. Way to go girl. I have so many friends who feel this same way and feel like it’s a constant battle to not let themselves get in their own way. I used to be that way academically (and still am to some degree), but I think the constant stress just led me to burn out. I remember feeling so jealous of girls in my MS program who seemed to have it all together… then I learned they were nearing 30 and I’m just 23. I’ll get there. Maybe. ;)
    From a reader’s perspective, you do appear to have it together, but you also seem so chill and relatable- two wonderful qualities!
    Now, about that pita. I’ll take one for lunch please!

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  2. Yes, and yes. Every time I experience someone else being vulnerable and honest my respect and love for them only grows. And every time I do the same, our relationship just gets that much closer. This is being proven to me time and again, and so why are we (I) still so afraid to show these parts of ourselves? I will fully admit that I too clean or cook far more than I need to before having a visitor and then pass everything off as “pfft it took me like 5 seconds.” It would feel really embarrassing to have someone see how I prepare before they come… so maybe next time I need to either try not doing the same kind of prep, or actually admitting that, yes I did clean before you came. Hmmm. Thank you for this – such a great post.

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  3. You have the prettiest photos! I totally agree with you on all of those, though! We definitely should do things because we want to, not because it’s expected or we want to appear one way or another. I definitely struggled with this when I was planning my wedding – I have a really big family, but only see them for holidays and what not for the most part. I struggled with wanting to have the huge extravagant that my family expected/my pre-teen self envisioned, and what I knew would make us happy (and not clear out our savings!) We ended up “eloping” with 12 people and it was PERFECT. Then my dad threw us a “reception” backyard BBQ that was relaxed and simple. It was the perfect mix, even though explaining it to my family (sorry, mom) was rough.

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  4. What a relatable post :) Your writing is always so honest and I love the style you have when expressing yourself. Plus, I am drooling at that oatmeal photo! It’s been too long since I enjoyed carrot cake oats. They are one of my fave combos! Your morning snack looks yummy :)

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  5. Hooray for a little bit of vulnerability and honesty! It’s refreshing to see someone share a part of themselves that is so relatable. I think we all feel what you’re describing and few are brave enough to admit it, and yet, I think we’d all feel a little more connected if we could just admit these things :)

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  6. Boy does this resonate with me!! I think there’s something about this time of year that amplifies it too…have I decorated enough? Did I buy the right (read: expensive/thoughtful enough) gifts? Did I bake enough cookies/fudge/bark etc.? (The answer to the last one: there are never enough cookies lol). Really appreciate your honesty, and love seeing posts like this. You are definitely not alone in that struggle, but I think you’ll find that each year brings you a little closer to finding out what/who is truly YOU :)

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    • Ahh that is so true about the holidays being a breeding ground for it. (Also very true about the cookies haha!) But the thought of learning simply by living and with the passing of time is such a hopeful and encouraging one. THANK YOU <3 Hope you're having a great week, Nicole :)

      Like

  7. I have been this way throughout grad school, which thankfully it is almost over, but pheww, I am the queen of putting pressure on myself and hold extremely high expectations. I’ve learned to cut down a little so if I don’t enjoy something, I’ll give it up (I did this for College Division 1 softball and prior to, quitting was not in my vocab). If something stresses me out, I’ll try to decrease it from my life, though I have a longggg way to go here. You’re not alone in trying to appear put together, though I think you are being too harsh on yourself. You seem wise beyond your years and very on top of things – cut yourself some slack :) I feel the same about showing a balanced lifestyle – I loveeee my sweets, but as a future RD, are people going to “judge” me or feel that they can’t relate because I kind of eat alot of them? No. I think it’s way more important to show that we ARE HUMAN, and we gravitate towards foods that satisfy our needs at that time.

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    • It is so so true – I think if I were a client/patient seeing a dietitian with a “perfect’ diet, it would discourage me more than anything. Amen to coming to the conclusion that there’s no shame in quitting something that is bringing you down. So much easier said than done though! And THANK YOU for your sweet words.

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  8. I love the ‘under 3 layers of mascara part’ ;)
    It is so exhausting to try to be so put together all the time. I still struggle with this, but motherhood has for sure calmed me down. Except for the cooking and house cleaning part. I’m pretty sure that I will always be OCD about that.
    Love those oats!

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  9. I really enjoyed this, I feel like if you are surrounded by people who show their weaknesses as well, it becomes less of a struggle to try to hide the true you. For me, I have a crazy sweet tooth and a love for alcohol and a bad habit of not attending the gym nearly enough, and maybe I don’t always feel like telling everyone that, just so people think I am healthier. But the fact is that these things make us human and normal! Being the person who is always on top of everything isn’t always relatable, because I don’t think anyone is. So thank you for this post! P.S, that lindt chocolate is everything and that supper??? Omg

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  10. It isn’t easy being vulnerable to others or even ourselves; think that is just part of being human,

    You are so wonderful, beautiful, lovely and smart Jacklyn….you are pretty special if you ask me.

    I wrote more but it got erased….guess this is a good place to end.

    Happy Wednesday!

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  11. Lolol love the “mandatory” chocolate. I’m in the same boat. It’s essential nutrients to me.

    Also – Mary’s gone crackers w/ hummus plus an apple is my DREAM of a snack. I wish I had gone to the market for that this week!!

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  12. Oh Jacklyn, your post resonated with me SO much!! Yes I struggle with this too, this feeling I should always be “on”, in the food/eating department especially! We always wanna present our best selves, hey? But you are so right in that when we do make ourselves vulnerable, it kind of disrupts that cycle & takes the pressure off- and just lets us be our true selves. And that is real & good! Bless you for being so out there & honest. 😊 And by the way, your carrot cake oats look amazing… Hello tomorrow’s breakfast!! Xx

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    • Aw thank you Rebecca! Hearing from people today who can totally relate has been such a testament to how much we all have in common, despite our differences. Such a beautiful thing to be reminded of. And carrots and oatmeal were truly made for each other :) Enjoy!! xo

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  13. Great post!! It can be really hard to always strive for perfection and sometimes it’s perfectly okay to let our imperfections shine. We are who we are and that okay too. Thanks for the reminder that’s it’s totally okay to not have it all together all the time :)

    Like

  14. Pingback: Friday Faves xiv | Jack's Balancing Act

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